Francesco (Frank) Mannella

I grew up in a small town setting in the heart of southern Italy. There was a time during my childhood where I was surrounded by joy and wonder. I was the oldest of 8 children and remember the love and pride I felt being surrounded by hard working parents, grandparents, uncles and aunts. At the age of 8, I suffered a horrible trauma that affected every part of my being and quickly tainted the world that I had come to love. I found comfort in nature at that time, and although there were many dangers (poisonous snakes, wolves, bears), it was the one place where I felt safe. By the age of 11, school no longer interested me. I spent every possible moment outside in the natural world and loved the land that I called home.

At the age of 12, my father left for Canada leaving me as the eldest male member of our family. This came with added responsibilities, but I still managed to find freedom on the land. Two and a half years later, my father had saved enough money for us to join him. In August of 1957, I, along with my mother and seven brothers and sisters, immigrated to Canada

It broke my heart to leave Italy. I remember most vividly saying goodbye to my grandfather. I had a huge lump in my throat and I saw that he had tears in his eyes. Out of everyone in my life, it was my Grandfather who always made me feel loved and special. I left a land that I loved, and entered into a new world that seemed cold and foreign to me. I did not know the culture, the language, or the people. I started school here, but dropped out because of the constant bullying. At the age of 15, I join the work force. I began by shining shoes during the day and took a hairdressing course during the evenings. Eleven months later, I graduated as a hairdresser and immediately found work.

Two years later, I owned my own business. I employed most of my family, and they were impressed at how well I had adjusted to this new land. But the truth was that I felt like I was living in a box. I felt as though I was so busy trying to impress others that I no longer knew who I was. A few years later, one of my clients asked me a question that changed my life: "Do you know who you really are?"

I had become a master at knowing how to read other people. I knew how to determine who they wanted me to be. I knew what was expected of me, and lived up to everyone's expectations, but I felt like I was dying inside. I began a slow process of breaking away from the expectations that I had allowed myself to become imprisoned by. Many people turned on me, and at times I questioned my own sanity, but something inside of me kept me moving forward on a quest for truth.

I began reading about ancient civilizations and discovered a passion for uncovering "origins" and truths from the past. I became deeply involved in the study of Kabbalah and was fascinated by the mysteries of the mind. Indeed Kabbalah helped me to regain a sense of passion for life, but I knew there was more, and I struggled with the hierarchy that so many religions are guilty of embracing.

It was only when I took part in a traditional ceremony held by a Mohawk elder from Six Nations that something was triggered deep inside of me. The language spoken was one of simplicity and equality. People were celebrated as unique and beautiful individuals with exceptional gifts and talents to offer to the world. No one was asked to convert or change who they were. Instead we were encouraged to celebrate and embrace the beauty of who the Creator made us to be. We were taught that all we need to know as human beings can be discovered by spending time on the land. And we were taught to honour the Ancestors and lineages from which we came. Only then would we feel complete. In the words of my teacher: "I am not here to make you an Indian, that can never be. I am here to teach you how to listen to the language of the living spirit so that one day you'll be able to connect with your own Ancestors and receive teachings directly from them."

Those words spoke to my heart and have inspired me ever since. Finally, I felt my quest for truth had brought me to a place where I could find a pure foundation on which to build. Much has happened since that time. I have found purpose and fulfillment by embracing and following a disciplined way of life that seeks direction from Spirit, as opposed to a selfish life that is dictated by our past hurts and desires. I continue to celebrate the pursuit of truth and my biggest joy (apart from my children and grandchildren) comes from assisting and witnessing others as they find the truth that they are searching for.

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